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Gerard Sarnat 

 

     

 

     

Phineas and Ferb Episode Created by Hypersexual Home Inmates 

 

 

  Broken windows and empty hallways

                A pale dead moon in the sky streaked with gray

                Human kindness is overflowing

                And I think it's going to rain today *

 

                       

Pad-paddling to knock-knock her flooded floor plan’s padlocked forest door

start of our hyperanimated Tri-State Area Fifty Year Tempest, my double-

 

coned portals were smitten by Ms. Mermaid’s verdant turtleneck popping

out surreal mammary glands, then...Which reimagining’s more teasingly

 

ambiguous than when the hammerhead shark swam over to propose

something else a month later... Fireplace and downpour of normal proportions

 

once again, same Simone as on the old Victrola -- Mermatron’s DayGlo

scales and Botticelli tendrils plus Hubby’s stubble are speckled with gray now.

 

Topping off my usual alligator-armed, seemingly artificial flipper /

beaver-tail ritual, last night the fishoid creature delivered her original

 

orificial slap, (roughly rendered you’ll have to trust me on this one),

“Aahhrrgghh, I got used to swallowing your snout’s mute devolution

 

from loathing to disapproval to disappointment to profound corrosive

oval glumness while those otteroid hind limbs shot venom from both spurs.

 

Forced to wallow in Major Monogram’s thickety swamps to avoid

the pomp of endearing Doctor Doofenshmirtz’s male narrative about

 

how I can’t drop eggs, my cloaca’s hatching a saner response, Duckbill 's

laid another – he’s polecat-humping muthaclusterfuckin’ Perry the Platypus!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* Composed by Randy Newman, interpreted by Nina Simone

 

 

 

 

 

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